Corrin Dorothy Haggerty 12/02/2009

So this has been quite a week. Monday night I started having contractions and after about four hours we decided to head to the hospital to see if I was really in labor...no such luck. They sent me home at about 2:00 am with a pain pill and a sleeping pill and instructions to "get some rest." I thought that was pretty funny considering I was still having contractions! We went home and I did sleep a little, but was still contracting about once an hour.

Tuesday was restful as possible, we stayed home and tried to relax but it was very difficult. The baby was not moving, and we got really concerned and so made another trip to the hospital just to set me up on the monitors and make sure she was ok. As soon as we got there and got all hooked up she started kicking away like nothing was wrong. Ugh...7:00 pm and we are home again, exhausted and ready for bed already. Luckily our good friends Travis and Tracy had picked Ruth up and so we didn't have to worry about getting her exercise for the night, and decided to go to bed early.

At this point I am still contracting every hour, and have not had any hours of solid sleep since Sunday night. 3:00 am rolls around and I have a very strong contraction and decide to get up and take a bath, walk around the house, read and just try to relax. By 4:30 the contractions are coming more than four times an hour and by 5:30 am I was contracting about five to six times and decide to wake up Colin to start timing for me. We go along like this for six hours, me in pain, contractions getting stronger but never at regular time intervals. The doctors, books, internet, and everything else we have ever looked at says we have to wait until the contractions are at five minutes apart for an hour.

I decide in mid-contraction that I can't handle this anymore, and we call the doctor, who kindly says to come in. WOO HOO!!! We get to the Labor & Delivery triage and they check me out and HALLELUJIA - 4 centimeters!!! They are checking me in! I'm in LABOR!!!!! Wait...I'm in labor????? WHOA! They take me upstairs to the Labor & Delivery unit and we meet our team of medical professionals. Brad, the best anesthesiologist alive, Lea, the fantastic non-cheerleader nurse who reminds me of "Berta" from the T.V. show Two and a Half Men, and Dr. Kandal, my OB-Gyn.

Can I just say here that epidurals are miraculous. Six hours of labor at home that were supposed to be the easy ones and then another eleven at the hospital and the hospital ones were stronger and closer together and the hospital ones were not too bad at all (until I started feeling them and then Brad really took care of that). The problem was that while things were progressing, Corrin still was not dropping down to where she needed to be for me to deliver her. The doctors suggested we push for an hour to see what we can do. After an hour, nothing. She is still riding high and not wanting to go where she needs to for me to deliver.

This is where the doctor says medically, they do not think delivery the normal way is going to work, and recommend a caesarian section. This was a bummer to me, but I understood the risks to the baby and to me and this was the right way to go. We went into the room at 11:00 pm and by 11:55 Corrin Dorothy Haggerty was born and with us.

Colin, during all of this, was truly incredible. There with me every second, supporting me, helping me through contractions, supporting me when the doctors mentioned the dreaded “C” word, helping me feel like everything was going to be fine. He is amazing, and in the three days since she was born, he has proven every second that I could not ask for a better partner, and that he is an incredible husband and now, Daddy.

Words of Wisdom...

Recently I was e-mailing with a very good friend of mine lamenting about how I cannot prepare or practice for what it is going to be like with a new baby in the house...here is the advice she gave me:

"Of course you can prepare! Here's all you need to do to practice:

Eat pudding only with the opposite hand you usually rely on while holding a water balloon and swaying back and forth, cooing in between bites.

You already get up a zillion times/night to pee, so you're already prepping to replace those with feedings or to just check on her to verify she's doing all right.

Carry 7 different bags, containers, coats, water bottles, etc so every arm/hand/neck is filled, then, when you can't carry anything else, add in that water balloon and then set everything down to run back to the kitchen to get whatever 10 things you forgot.

Begin going to the store with a burp rag on your shoulder b/c there's a good chance you'll forget to remove it more than once.

Breastfeeding? Squeeze your nipples with a wrench every few hours for a few seconds then spray your chest with water to prep for those moments when you realize you've forgotten to place a liner in your bra.

There are lots more but this should give you a mini-boot camp. :-)

Oh, and find something you love more than anything in the world then imagine loving it a trillion times more every time you think, hear or look at it!"

Missing a Friend

Once, a very long time ago, I had a friend named Tiff. She is beautiful, absolutely hilarious, and I have known her since I was four. We have gone through some of the hardest times of our lives together, we have been there to share joys, sorrows, laughs and tears that are countless.

Over the years Tiff developed a drinking problem that became too much for me to handle and watch. As she slid into the depths of alcoholism we grew further apart and eventually, I had to cut off all communication with her. It was one of the most heart breaking moments of my life, and to this day I still feel some regret for it. That was February of 2008.

I am still close with her parents and little brother and hear that she is sober now, which fills me with a joy that is unimaginable. Unfortunately, our friendship has not mended. I call her and send texts on holidays and birthdays. When I told her I could not speak to her anymore I told her I will always love her, but refuse to support her in killing herself. I told her that I will be there for her the second she wants me when she is sober, that no matter what I support her and love her, just that I cannot watch her do what she was doing to herself and her children.

On days like today, when I am feeling nostalgic, and days away from having a baby I think a lot of Tiff, of how she has two beautiful children who are amazing little kids. How she will not be there when Corrin is born, and how I am crushed that our friendship did not endure. I miss her so much, and want so badly for her to be a part of this baby's life. My heart is forever with her, and I hope that she is happy now.

One week?????

How is it possible that my due date is just a week away? Seriously? I mean, here I am tripping along and the next thing I know I have a baby coming in a week (two weeks at the most). A baby...a human being! That little thing that's been punching my bladder for the last 39 weeks is going to finally be here among us. A new soul for the family, new experiences, new joy, new fears, new emotions that I have no idea I even am capable of yet.

My entire life I have been a runner (not an athletic runner - a mental runner). I tend to get bored with a place easily and have never lived longer than four yers in one location until now (seven years, it's a record). I always told myself it was because being in new places with new faces and new challenges was what life was all about. Travel...experience...feel something new and exciting. The reality is it is easier to move somewhere else when life is not great than to stay and figure out why and fix it. Don't get me wrong, I am forever thankful for the experiences I have had, and the places I have lived, and the lifelong friends I have been blessed to make along the way.

But, for the first time in my life I feel that living in one place for such a long time, putting down roots and watching them grow, sharing the joys and tragedies of family and friends is possibly the greatest blessing imaginable. Staying put for once has given me an incredible husband, a true partner who loves and respects me as much as I do him; a family that is not only close, but great friends who support all of the decisions and mistakes I make; and finally, a group of friends who are so incredible, so supporting, so loving that I did not think this type of closeness was possible until I met them.

To all of these people, thank you. To those friends who are not in the same state anymore - thank you for your support and love from afar, you have been amazing too and I wish you were here still. Corrin is blessed to be born into this support, and we are so excited for you all to meet her.

Quick Halloween Aside

My sister Chrysti told me I had to blog about this...

This year is the first year in my adult life of no partying on Halloween. Being the social animal that I am (translate to "I follow my husband because he likes to go out a lot"), we went to a very last minute Halloween party with some friends. It was thrown by people I don't know, and I have never felt more uncomfortable. It's strange enough being the only pregnant person at a party, much less the only pregnant person in a room full of people dressed up in odd costumes that you also don't know. Mind you, I was dressed up as a cat, but as you can see, this was a very primitive costume of maternity pants, a T-Shirt, tail and cat ears.

Generally when I am in a room full of people I don't know I will eventually just start talking to people, but this group was already drunk, and none too open. Luckily, more people started to show up and eventually I was able to blend in. That's when the questions started...a few people just gave me funny looks as I swilled water from my water bottle, a couple walked up to me and asked if my belly was real. REALLY??? No, as I sat there wondering what to be for Halloween this year "pregnant cat" immediately popped into my head, and "primitive, completely unimaginative pregnant cat" won the day. Seriously? Idiots.

Is it Really November?

My due date is twenty-four days away. TWENTY FOUR!!!! What have I been doing since my last post, you ask? Well...we have been very busy getting the baby's room ready, getting the house ready, buying everything we need, might need, will never need but are convinced we will one day need and exchanging things we think we will need, only different.

Last Friday was my 36 week appointment and it went very well. We got to hear Corrin's heartbeat and got another ultrasound so we could see if she is head down (yes) and looking normal (also yes). Now it's just a waiting game. I am not a patient person, and apprehension is growing. What is labor going to be like? I'm not really scared yet, don't worry - I feel that coming, I'm just wishing I knew. I pride myself on researching something until I know it completely, all of the twists and turns and possibilities. With this, there is no way of knowing what it is going to be like, feel like, or anything until it is here, happening. That is a bit strange to me.

It is so interesting to me that I can't "issue spot" my way through this. I can read a million books, I can talk to every sister, mom and friend that I know, I can watch my nieces and nephews to get ideas but until she is in our world showing us who she is, we really will have no idea what life is going to be like. That's a lot to swallow for this Type A lawyer.

That said, as of Friday, if I go into labor she will be considered full-term and we will let to have her in our lives. I am so excited!!

Corrin's Shower

Last Saturday my sister Chrysti and best friend Kitty threw a shower for Corrin and I at one of my other sister's (Katie's) house. It was truly overwhelming how many people came to celebrate this with us, and I am still on cloud nine feeling blessed to be so loved. I stole the photos from Kitty's blog and am hoping to get some more from Katie soon...there are none of me because I look like an elephant.

The colors were beautiful and they had fun games to play, and an awesome one-sie station where everyone made little puff paint one-sies for our girl! SO CUTE!! I literally spent three hours on Sunday unwrapping, opening, clipping and organizing all of the amazing gifts and did three loads of laundry of baby stuff! Corrin is going to be one WELL dressed little girl.

It truly was the shower of my imagination, and dreams.

Corrin's Room

So last weekend Colin & Chris picked up all of our baby furniture and Scott & Chrysti helped Colin paint the room and get all the furniture in and put together. It's so beautiful and such a labor of love for Colin and all our friends and family who helped since I can't be around paint. We love the softness of the green with the deep espresso furniture, and are convinced we will spend many happy hours with our baby girl in here! I can't wait to get pictures on the wall and her bedding!!!

Coats

For those of you who know me (all six who read this), you also know I have a serious coat fetish. I love them. Coats can set a mood as far as I'm concerned, and are the best part of fashion. Winter is my favorite season of all, mainly because I get to break out all of my coats and wear them and say hello to them, and love them.

That said, there are many, many very cute coats out there this season as Ms. Carrot & Spice showed us earlier this week. This year I can't break out my coats and love them. Why, you ask. Becasue I have a watermelon attached to me and none of them fit!!! Ugh! Now, I only have 62 days (give or take) left of this, and then the time it takes for my belly to go down and so I still get some winter to relish in my coats, but right now, when we should be breaking them out and loving them for the first time of the season, I had to go downstairs and apologize. They know it's cold out and they are stuck in a closet. Poor things.

I could buy a new maternity coat, but honestly, I don't think it's fair to the coat. I will wear it for the next couple of months and then pack it away never to be worn again unless I am lucky enough to be pregnany in winter time again. It just seems very unfair.

Prepared Childbirth

Well, it took 30 weeks, but I have officially reached the point of being a little afraid of the whole labor process. I have always looked at it like I don't have much control over the process, and she's coming no matter what, so why freak out. Until last night...here I was bobbing along, blissfully unaware, and then we took our first "Prepared Childbirth" class. This is a four week course for three hours every Wednesday to help prepare you and our partner for labor and delivery.

I really did think that having three sisters, two sister-in-law and thirteen nieces and nephews would be all the prep I needed. Especially since one of my sisters is a labor and delivery nurse and I have heard some stories from her! Yeah, blissfully unaware. We spent time introducing ourselves, where we live, what flavor baby we are having, favorite gifts so far and what we wanted out of the class. Colin was cute, he wants to know how to help me the most. I, of course, wanted to know how to keep control of the situation and not have any craziness while I'm laboring. I can't handle the drama. This part was pretty cool. It was fun hearing what the other mothers and fathers had to say, and learning about the people I am going to spend twelve hours with over the next few weeks.

Then they showed the video. Real video of real people having real babies. Naturally, with no drugs and some serious screaming. And did you know that little sucker is purple when it comes out. That's going to freak me out! I'll say it, the whole thing sort of overwhelmed me. I mean, I know I'm pregnant, it's certainly not a surprise or anything. I am so excited to meet her and have her out and about, but I was sort of glossing over the labor part. I blocked out that I have to do that before she can be "out and about."

The good news, women have been doing this for millenia. I'm strong, I can totally handle it, with a really good anesthesiologist and same good music on the radio I'm ready to go!

Ruth

In keeping with the accident prone family theme I seem to have going, I've decided the my little Ruthie is a chip off the old genetic block (even though she's a doggie). Monday morning Colin and I were enjoying a nice breakfast on the front porch and Ruth comes walking out looking like a Mastiff. Seriously, her entire face was swollen to the point where she could barely see and I could actually see hives through her fur! I freaked out and called the vet while Colin did a quick examination.

She had a bite mark on one of her lips and was obviously having a reaction. It being Labor Day, the vet was closed so we ruched her to the emergency vet where the guy behind the counter looked at her and promptly said "OH! Well I'll take her back right away!!" That made me feel better, at this point she had passed Mastiff and moved on to St. Bernard. Poor thing.

They dosed her up with an IV of antihistamine and steroids and told us to give her Benadryl that night too. Colin wouldn't let me take a picture! She's doing MUCH better now, her little face is back to normal and everything, but she is still lethargic from all the drugs. I would like to thank my best friend Kitty for recommending we get pet insurance! It will help ease the burden!

Um....

So "they" said this would happen...someone told me that as I got further into my pregnancy I would start to want a puppy, kitten, little chick, etc. I, of course, said NO WAY. Until recently. I find myself convinced that Ruth needs a buddy and that I need something cute and cuddly. Yes, I am well aware that I am going to have a baby in eleven and a half weeks. And no, this does not deter me. At all.

The breeder where we got Ruth, Rio Rock Labs, retires their mom's after two or three litters. Mimi, Ruth's mom, just had her last litter before they adopt her out to a good family. Now, I would happily take Mimi, and sadly, she only had one puppy in this litter. I find myself completely heartbroken for the one singular puppy (who is already spoken for) and Mimi. What happened to her other babies!!

All this said, luckily Mr. Haggerty has a good head on his shoulders and does not give in to my pleas to go to the Dumb Friends League or Max Fund and find Ruth a buddy. For now.

Welcome Baby Rayah!!!

Yesterday my baby sister Kerrie gave birth to the most beautiful baby girl!!! Her name is Rayah Joanne Clayton and she is quite perfect. Both mom and baby are doing very well, and as soon as I have photos I will post them.

We got to go and visit her in the afternoon and she has the sweetest face and attitude. She didn't make a peep the entire time we were there and is just the most serene, peaceful little being I have seen in a long time. Her daddy said that even when the other little babies were all screaming she was just content to sit there and hang out.

Welcome baby Rayah, to our obnoxious and loving family, we are so excited to have your soul as a part of our tribe.

What to Do?

The third time was NOT a charm. In fact, it was nothing. The seller just outright rejected our offer, not even a counter-offer. This whole process has gotten us thinking very hard about the decision to purchase a home and if it is right for us at this point. We currently live in a great house, in a beautiful neighborhood and cannot help but wonder if taking on the extra expense of a mortgage when we also have the looming costs of child care in six short months.

On the flip-side, owning a home has been a dream of ours since before we were married. To be so close and then put it on hold might be too difficult. Our Realtor has been incredible, and I cannot imagine how we would have gone through all of what we have dealt with without him, how do we repay him for all this work if we stop looking now.

With the baby coming in thirteen and a half weeks I also wonder how much of this is my own emotion driven desire to start nesting and have a settled home to bring her to. As it stands, even if we found a house next week we could not close until a couple of weeks before she gets here. It is all very frustrating and confusing. I am positive that we will be led in the right direction and whatever decision we make will be the one that is right for us, but for now we will keep praying for guidance on this chapter and hope to have some resolution soon.

3rd Time's a Charm???

Ok - house hunting has resumed. We spent some time Saturday looking at a few houses and found one that we really like. Over the last four months we have learned that compromise is a must, and so this house only has two bedrooms on the first level and a kitchen that needs some help in the future...But, it's very cute, in a good neighborhood and has a finished basement that our brother-in-law Clayton will fit in. His height has been the litmus test for every basement we have been in since we started looking (since Colin and I are midgets).

The good news is this is not our "forever" home, and if we do have a second child, the kids can share a bedroom pretty easily. The lot is huge and it has a garage. So...no offer yet, but keep your fingers crossed! Hopefully the third time is a charm.

For my Husband

Through all of the craziness that is pregnancy, I have been incredibly blessed to have Colin. A few weeks ago we celebrated four years of being together and I am constantly reminded by him of how amazing he is. Today when I should have been working I was looking at some old pictures, and this poem I wrote for our wedding day came up. It is as meaningful now as it was one year and six months ago. I love you baby!

They came from opposite worlds,
But were blessed with the same values.
His family is a tree, hers an orchard.
Separately, they were taught that love is life,
That family is fundamental.

She was cynical about matters of the heart,
He was enjoying a new life and location.
Neither wanted love or a relationship
And still, their hearts found each other,
Through a very well placed elbow.

They spent an evening in conversation
And their hearts began to beat in unison.
They began their dance in the mountains,
And beside a glistening lake love ignited,
Began to grow, and bonded family and friends.

They were slightly guarded and both fearful
They tried to trick their hearts,
And manipulate away from love,
But the bond overwhelmed them,
They gave in, and their love grew stronger.

In celebration they took a trip,
To the lake shore where their love first began
He asked that she be with him forever
She agreed before he completed the thought,
And again their love grew.

Together they celebrate their love today,
With family and friends to support them.
With all the joy imaginable,
They share their belief that love is life,
And begin their new foundation.

Clumsy

Grace has never been something I have been associated with. Generally I am awkward and fall down a lot. The pregnancy has brought on a whole new level of clumsiness though. I have more bumps and bruises then ever before, most from running into things or tripping.

Yesterday was no exception. I took the bus home from work because the Jeep was in the shop. I got off at a stop about a mile from my house and started walking. Ten steps into my walk I tripped what I have decided to call "ground turbulence," also known as air, and face planted into the asphalt at the very busy intersection of University and 1st Street in Cherry Creek. Basically, I took a digger. I managed to break my fall with my knee and wrist, and thankfully did not land on my belly, but my pride has a really bad fracture!

Picture, if you will...pregnant woman in a little black knee high dress tripping and falling in the street. Getting up with sunglasses crooked on her face and trying really hard to play it off like my knee isn't bleeding like a ten year old at summer camp. So much fun!

And the countdown is on....

So we went to our twenty-four week appointment last Monday and it dawned on me that in sixteen (now fifteen and a half) weeks we will have a new baby in the house! A new soul to share our days and nights with. This is an overwhelming thought, not simply becasue of the nervousness we feel, but also because of the joy. I am truly overcome.

I pray that we can teach her and guide her and still give her enough freedom to make her own choices and mistakes. I hope that we can teach her to learn from her mistakes and not always save her when things go wrong but be there to support her. Sometimes people bail their children out too much because let's face it, they are children, but sometimes the best lessons are the hard lerned ones and I pray that we can learn the difference.

No Random Thoughts...No Thoughts at All

Basically, the last couple of weeks have been a serious bummer. The house fell through, I managed to alienate one of my cousins, and I am officially terrified about being a mom.

Colin and I went to register at Babies R' Us last weekend thinking a number of things but mainly that we have a clue about what we are doing. My initial plan was to go with someone who has done this before, but I thought, what the heck, give it a try. HA! That said, we managed to get some things on the registry, I have no idea if they are right, if we need them or where we are going to put them. But most importantly, I learned that despite avid reading, Internet research, talking with my sisters and friends and watching parents and children everywhere I really have absolutely no idea what I am about to get into.

My saving grace??? An incredible husband who is totally supportive. Of course, he's freaked out too and I'm not about to stress the poor guy out more. We still have not registered for things like car seats, strollers, pac-n-play's, etc. because we decided more research is necessary....

So - to the title of this post. My parents will gladly tell you that I am one serious procrastinator. My general thought is if something needs to be done the very last minute is the best time to do it. I literally shut down until I am forced to do something. Over the years, this has been an incredibly successful trait and any lawyer will tell you, something we all do. The problem is I am so freaked out about Little Miss Wiggly that I literally can't think at all. Not only do I not have random thoughts, I have NO thoughts.

Now I am well aware that this is a time in life when procrastination is an EXTREMELY bad idea, and I am trying very hard to work through it. But each time I think of things like daycare my brain literally shuts off and I find myself a half hour later reading TMZ.com. ME!!! I mean, normally I procrastinate with CNN.com or something semi-productive. This is BAD.

Of course here I am...blogging when I could be working out our child's daycare, financial future, my work schedule after she is born...you name the important other thing I could be thinking about and working on. UGH!!!!

Dissapointed

Well, after a two and a half hour inspection on the house last Friday, we learned that there are a few issues that must be taken care of. First, the roof is not up to code and needs either a five year certification or replacement. Second, there is an issue with the furnace such that neither the heat or the AC will turn on. Third, and largest, we had a plumber film the main sewer line and we learned that at the junction between the house and the line to the alley the pipe is "on the verge of collapse."

In and of themselves, these things are not complete disasters, and our thought was that the owner would need to replace or fix these items for every potential buyer and it is in their best interest to do it for the one that they are under contract with and who has confirmed, secured financing. Boy, were we wrong. They signed back the inspection report that they are refusing to repair or even look at any of it.

This is incredibly disheartening. "Ready to Move" barely begins the state of my mind and heart right now, and the idea that we are not closing in three weeks is breaking my heart. We refuse to purchase a home that will cause this much grief, and honestly feel strong-armed into accepting somethings that are major issues.

The problem remains, however, that we became attached to this home and the idea of this home and now we have to start all over. It had everything we wanted in the perfect neighborhood and I am simply heartbroken. It took us almost five months to find this. Is it going to be another five months and the baby be born before we find another?

Happy Anniversary!!!

Today is my parents twenty-fourth wedding anniversary. They are two truly amazing people whose love is as full and passionate today as it was when they met and married. I have never seen them raise their voices at each other in anger, and they have done nothing but shown each other love, compassion, sharing and kindness. They are a model for any relationship, and I pray my marraige is as strong twenty-four years from now as I know theirs will still be.

Birthdays

Birthdays are an incredible thing. I woke up this morning another year older, but I feel better than I ever have in my entire life. God has blessed me with a husband who not only loves me, but who shows me each and every day how much he loves me. A family that is truly incredible and there for me no matter what I need, friends who may as well be family for how amazing they all are, and a job I get to go to every day and enjoy. Today is a day of being thankful. For the four of you who read this, thank you so very much for being a part of this life.

Wow - I'm Becoming a Grown Up

I have always tried to live by the motto "grow up, never grow old." The problem is I have not really found myself growing up over the years. Recently, however, there have been a few major changes to my life that make me think maybe I am finally growing up a little.

The first you all know about...little miss baby girl who will be joining us in late November. The second happened this weekend. My husband (still odd to say after a year and five months) are under contract for a house! That's right, we have a contract on a sweet little duplex in Denver's Governor's Park neighborhood. I am so excited I can barely stand it! And scared, and more than a little ready to move in and start decorating!

Now, I have had friends and family over the last few months all but houses and all have issues come up after the contract has been signed and delivered so I am not totally devoid of reality, however it is really hard to not be mentally moved in before I get the keys...any advice on this would be VERY helpful!

Mammoth

Today is full of random thoughts, but mainly that I feel like a woolly mammoth. Seriously. I don't know if anyone has ever told you this, but prenatal pills make ALL of your hair grow. Head hair, arm hair, even the fuzzy little facial hairs are longer. Add that to the growing size of my belly, butt and boobs and I feel like a big, gigantic woolly mammoth. That and grooming in certain areas has become quite comical considering I can no longer see down there. I think I need to start yoga to gain a little better flexibility.

OH - and my little girl is on the move. Quite an odd thing to feel another being moving around inside you. Now I know how those astronauts felt on alien. She is most active when I lay down at night and in the morning. She does not like it when I sit at my desk. However, she is going to like to dance. I was listening to a Chris Webb CD and she was jumping all over the place!!

We can't feel anything on the outside yet, but hopefully soon. Of course, being the neurotic freak that I am, I tend to have little conniption fits when I don't feel her moving. In talking with other pregnant friends, this is apparently normal, but I don't like feeling her one day and not very much the next. The little stinker is already freaking her Mom out.

My Boobs

I have forever had a love-hate relationship with my boobs. They didn't grow until I was out of college, and then, for a few blissful years, they were fantastic. I mean it, I loved them. Unfortunately, they got a little big for my taste (so did I), and will only be the right size if I manage to get down to a somewhat scary weight.

That said, presently, due to my condition, they are freakin' huge. Seriously, they are in the way. I can't put my arms all the way down, and try to play a round of pool with these mama's. I have purchased three new bras since becoming pregnant and have grown out of ALL of them. I have 20 1/2 weeks to go!!!!! If they are this bad now who knows what the future holds. Ugh!

Payback is a BITCH

For all one of you that read this, Random Thought of the day is that payback is a bitch. Yesterday when I complained about being stuck in a traffic jam the Traffic Gods paid me back IN FORCE!

Picture late morning, I have to go to the detention center to visit a client (for any random readers - and I know there are none - I am an immigration lawyer) and find out that my client has been moved to Park County jail. Color me thrilled to take a nice drive in the mountains!!!! But nooooooo, construction traffic again turns my lovely drive into hell.

Moral of the story, no complaining about traffic unless you want to have instant karma bite you in the ass.

TRAFFIC

So here's the thing, I used to love to drive my car. It was a good way to relax on the way in to work and let's face it, driving is exhilarating! At least when you have a lead foot and get about one ticket a year.

However lately, there is a huge construction project going on at the intersection in front of my office. Not just some re-paving, but expansion, new lights, paving, etc. It is, in a word, a nightmare. Every day I get to about a mile from my intersection and learn that either the right, or left, lane are closed. It is never consistent for two days in a row and the blind curve directly before the construction people place the cones is always a fun way to think you might die in the morning.

It makes me tired, frustrated and I am positive my blood pressure is skyrocketing. And this is at 8:00 in the morning. I still have a day of work to go! I find myself REALLY looking forward to August when they say they are going to be done...of course my husband the engineer has taken a look at it recently and says no way. Oh well, I'll have to find another fun curve to speed around in the meantime...

By Popular Demand

Ok, well really only a request from my best friend, but here goes...

I am going to try to start blogging. I mean actually blogging and not the once a year crap I've been doing for the last year.

On March 15 my husband and I learned that I am pregnant after months of trying and years of being told it was not possible. For the next few months I am going to do "Random Thoughts" on this and I am sure, many other things. I'm sorry ahead of time if I bore you.

Random thoughts for today, I can feel the baby move, and it terrifies me. I will forever sit in awe of the fact that the hospital gives any person an infant human being after birth and says "here, take it home, don't kill it." Do they think this is in payment for going through the birthing process? Quite honestly, why would you want to take home the thing that just casued you so mich pain (so my sister's tell me)?

Don't get me wrong, I already love this child. I actually started crying during my ultrasound the other day (I am soooo not a crier). But I am 36 going on 12, how am I going to take care of this little child when my concept of a good dinner is frozen fish sticks and popsicles, and that was before I got pregnant. I really, really enjoy time on my couch. Apparantly, that's totally gone now too! And what about late night concerts? This is why I am going on 12, I used to live the life of a teenager with a really good fake ID.

Thus, if in 16 years you see a young girl that resembles me and is a wild child, you will understand. It's becasue Mommy took her to concerts from birth and explained how important it is to open your throat when drinking from the beer bong.

Confused Trees

The sun is shining, it's a gorgeous day in the Rocky Mountains and it has been in the 70's for about a week. It is also the middle of January. I need to preface the following random thought with the fact that I LOVE THE COLD. I look forward to winter, I enjoy watching the seasons change but the only real reason I like Summer is becasue it brings me one step closer to cold.

As I sit in my ofice, looking at the open space behind our building I saw this morning that the Aspen trees are budding!!!! I noticed it yesterday but tried to pretend I was fooling myself. Then while out walking last night I noticed the outline of little buds again. Did I mention it's January. It is way too early for this nonsense.